If, as now seems the common wisdom, music competition shows are more about the judges than the contestants, The X Factor could hardly have done better in enlisting Britney Spears as a new arbiter of who can cram the most notes into a musical phrase. Spears embodies as much of that indefinable quality that lifts a singer into super-duper-stardom, plus⦠well, sheâs Britney, which means she brings to any professional endeavor that mixture of sweetness, shrewdness, nervous energy, unpretentiousness, and, occasionally, defiance that only finds its full flower when sheâs trying most earnestly to be a surrogate for the masses. Which is what she managed to do on her X Factor debut, even while she was being treated like pop royalty.
Spears got the star treatment on The X Factor season premiere on Wednesday night, billed last, introduced last when walking to the judgesâ chairs with Simon Cowell, L.A. Reid, and Demi Lovato: It built to her. She did just fine, rattling off a variety of âNoâs to the punching-bag mediocrities the producers let in for comic relief, and offering sensibly measured praise and a few out-and-out raves the rest of the time. In other words, she didnât overdo it, she looked comfortable, and Iâm including the moment when she was confronted with an old duet partner, Don Philip, whose voice was shot. Youâre not going to convince me for a second that the producers didnât vet Philipâs appearance on that stage without first getting Spearsâ okay, so it just made for a mildly pathetic spectacle on his part.
Lovato was lively, free with smiles, and juuuust this side of cocky. She held up well for most of the two hours, teasing Simon skillfully. Her carefully arranged moment arrived at the end of the evening, when Jillian Jensen, who said sheâd been bullied a lot over the years, made one perfect tear fall down Lovatoâs cheek. Jillianâs voice was refreshingly raw for a show like X Factor, and she deserved her pass through to the next round. But I donât think that a measure of skill is, as Lovato put it, that Jillian has âthe ability to stand on the stage and sing while youâre cryingâ â" if anything, thatâs a reason to tweak the young woman for being a tad unprofessional and to buck up, youâre in the majors now. But tear-jerking is one reason shows like X Factor exist: Build âem up, tear âem down, hour after hour.
The hokey narratives imposed on some contestants almost ruined the moments of pure quality. Take the nightâs first example: Paige Thomas, a fine R&B belter who was ridiculed in Austin, Texas, backstage by Kaci Newton, who whispered to her sister (and therefore to the cameras) that Thomas was just another minor roadblock to Kaciâs path to inevitable stardom, and that Thomas had âa run in her pantyhoseâ! This little stitiched-together non-cat-fight did not prevent Thomas from receiving her proper showcase and judgesâ praise, but it set up the tiresome inevitability of revealing Kaci as a caterwauling mediocrity. The lesson was hammered home: Judge not lest ye be judged, kids.
Itâs this kind of reality-TV imposed drama that almost makes one appreciate the storytelling power of scripted junk like NCIS. And the parade of the talentless, the sad, and the pathetic, waved onstage for Simon to deliver canned-sounding put-downs, makes X Factor, like American Idol, so dreary to watch.
Thank goodness Reid keeps his comments mostly on-point and unexaggerated. And it looks as though Lovato and Spears are going to do well. Once the preminary carnival is over â" are people really going to be talking tomorrow about Quatrele Daâan Smith, in a white wedding gown and howling Lady Gaga, as though heâs a truly refreshing novelty? â" weâll get to see whether Britney and company can sustain some their best judgments and coax a true talent into the winnerâs circle.
Twitter: @kentucker
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