X Factor 2 Premiere: The Best and Worst of the Auditions - HULIQ

From the bad performers to the great, thousands turned out for the "X Factor" Season 2 live auditions to hopefully hear Simon Cowell, L. A. Reid, Demi Lovato, and Britney Spears say they have what it takes to compete for a $5 million recording contract.

Well, it finally arrived: The second season of "X Factor," complete with two new judges, Britney Spears and Demi Lovato, and no new host (as yet). Simon Cowell returned, of course, with his sparring buddy, producer L. A. Reid. And after making a big show of the star power of the show -- the crowds, the screams, the much louder screaming when Britney appeared -- the "X Factor" Season 2 got down to doing what it does: Selecting fodder for the star-maker machine.

There were several great voices that made it through to the "boot camp" round of the competition. First up was Paige Thomas, who was there with her family and 3-year-old daughter, who was just cuteness personified. The producers were all about making viewers sympathize with the young mother, editing in snarky commentary from two Texas sisters, one of which, Kaci Newton, would be auditioning and launching her career as the next Michael Jackson (her hyperbole). But the two haters shut up when Paige, who had a Rihanna-like vibe (although she's much prettier) because of her outfit and hair, belted out Mary J. Blige's "I'm Going Down."

Then there was Reed Deming, a 13-year-old who looked like a younger version of Justin Bieber, hair and all. Although he said he was his own person and didn't want to be part of the Bieber stereotype ("I gotta be me," he said), he didn't seem to mind the attention and people telling him who he looked like. But when he got before the judges, his cuteness won most of them over. But Simon being Simon was all business and stopped him partway through his shaky performance of Bruno Mars' "It Will Rain." He got him to sing another Mars tune, "Grenade," where young Reed redeemed himself, getting four yeses from the judges.

Although groups don't tend to do all that well in these types of competitions (note how quickly they disappeared during the first season of "X Factor" and the lack of group winners on like shows that allow them into the contests), that doesn't mean there aren't a few worthy of consideration and talented enough to get recording deals. A trio of young guys called Emblem3 were trying to distance themselves from being called a boy band and even got some pointers from an ex-boy band member prior to hitting the stage. But where Vincent Thomas failed to win the judges' approval, Emblem3 got their attention and approval with an original song called "Sunset Boulevard."

It was during Emblem3's performance that Demi possibly solidified her role as the panel's flirt. She seemed to be flirtatious with all the young men that hit the stage. Simon apparently has taken on the role of surrogate father, often chiding her on her behavior.

Possibly the best voice of the premiere came late with Jennel Garcia's performance of Grace Potter and the Nocturnals' "Paris (Ooh La La)." A self-admitted she-rocker who listened to Pat Benatar, the teen's stage presence was visceral. She walked the stage and worked the audience, totally getting into the song. The judges loved her, as well they should have.

The one true tearjerker moment of the night came at the end with the performance of Jillian Jensen, a 19-year-old whose different-ness had made her the target of bullying most of her life. When she shared her story, Demi commiserated. She and L. A. both told the young singer that the bullies were watching her (a "so how do you like me now?" kind of confidence booster) and not the other way around. She sang Jessie J's "Who You Are" and broke down before the end, responding to the crowd's approval, but amazingly kept control of her vocals. Demi went up on stage and hugged her.

And what would auditions shows be without the bad, the horrible, the delusional? The Season 2 premiere had its share of those acts as well.

Of course there was the aforementioned self-appointed snob and unasked parental advice bestower (she said she couldn't believe Paige Thomas brought her child to the audition), Kaci Newton. She told the cameras before going on that her voice was a cross between Carrie Underwood and Adele. But when she got on stage and auditioned with Katy Perry's "Firework," she couldn't manage even the vocal equivalency of a tiny firecracker. When the judges told her she wasn't very good, she said she didn't want to hear that. And perhaps those who belittle others are better heard drowned out by a church choir (of which she admitted being a member).

There was Don Phillips, who worked with Britney a decade ago and was trying to get back into the business. He had a unique sound but one the judges didn't care for. His emotional appeal to Britney to give him a "yes" when all the other judges had given him a "no" was heartbreaking but she held firm and gave him a "no" as well. He broke down backstage, sobbing that he hadn't meant to hurt Britney. For her part, the 30-year-old pop star was devastated, but her fellow judges offered support and told her that she did the right thing not giving Phillips false hope.

But false hope is exactly what they gave Quatrele Da'an Smith, the obvious male crossdresser who might have seen too many Madonna videos -- or maybe completely mesmerized by Dennis Rodman in a dress as a child. Smith gave a completely atrocious performance of Lady Gaga's "Born This Way" (of course). And although awful in presentation, Smith's vocals weren't altogether as bad as the act. Only L. A. stood against him getting through to boot camp and when Simon cast his "yes" to get the young man through, L. A. shot Simon an incredulous look. But Simon said he liked Smith, even after telling him that the cake decorator looked like the progeny of Madonna, Bobby Brown and Dracula.

But the one guy that got a quick series of yeses was Shawn Armenta, a 50-years-old self-styled songwriter who said he'd been preparing for "X Factor" for one year and six months (and that's exactly the way he said it). He performed a song of his own composition, "Candy Girls." If one can imagine an uncoordinated flight deck coordinator on an aircraft carrier bringing in a jet crossed with someone trying to emulate the dance moves from the old Bangles video "Walk Like An Egyptian," the description might still pale in comparison to what Armenta was attempting on stage. When the judges panned him, he got defensive. Demi's critique of his vocals got a reply of: "That's why you use auto-tune." Britney told him he made her uncomfortable just looking at her. Backstage he stated that the judges had been unfair and he'd worked too hard -- but not once did Armenta mention going back to the dance studios and singing coaches and demanding the return of his money from those "trainers" that took advantage of him.

But if there's one thing viewers learned about Britney Spears' debut as a judge on "X Factor," it was that she doesn't have to say anything to get her verdict across. Her reactions to the auditions couldn't be more obvious if they were blinking in neon above her head. Although it could be suggested she work on her poker face, there was something truly honest about about Britney's body language that telegraphed where he decisions were headed: the various frowns, the painful grimaces, the wrinkled noses, the squinted eyes, the widened eyes, the quick withdrawals as if dodging a slap.

And viewers kept hearing "Britney's mean," which is what the producers of the show have been trying to sell over the summer: Britney as sort of a smaller sexy blonde version of the King of Mean, Simon Cowell. But she didn't come off quite as mean as she did honest to the point of being abrupt. She didn't waste time with a lot of explanations or dream-destroying metaphors, which is Simon's forte. To be fair, blunt and honest does not make one mean.

And Demi? Besides obviously establishing herself as the resident flirt on the panel, she appeared to take her role as judge seriously. With her hair pull back from her face, she looked as if she was trying to present a more mature Demi (she turned 20 on August 20). For the most part, she succeeded. When she didn't, it was during moments when Simon seemed to take amusement in needling her about her love life.

All in all, the "X Factor" Season 2 premiere was harmonious and professional -- but how long will that last? When the judges start competing with their teams and the critiques start getting personal or self-serving, will the comradery hold? And just how well will the two new judges do as mentors? There are still a few more auditions to wade through before boot camp and the mentoring at the judges' houses, though, but the acts getting the younger judges as mentors will have to worry that their relative inexperience might work against them in the competition.

But uncertainty is the spark of anticipation and it is why we watch.

The final verdict on the judges: L. A. Reid is still fair and all business; Demi Lovato adds enthusiasm and youthful honesty; Britney Spears is abruptly honest and lacks patience, which might be a good thing; but Simon Cowell reclaimed his crown as the "King of Mean" without really trying, despite the promos pushing Britney as "mean" and being quick to say no. As a team, they seem to work well together... so far.

"X Factor" airs on Fox Television on Wednesdays and Thursdays at 8:00 p.m. (EST).

(photo credit: Alison Martin, Creative Commons)

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